What The Freak?

Have you seen this? Unbelievable, very sad for all involved including the families but incredible.

UPDATE: I assume you've heard by now that the child who was originally believed to be 5 is actually a 14 year old girl. Here. Amazing. It chokes me up thinking about all who were lost and yet I'm thrilled for this girl and her family. Happiness amidst sadness, such a hard pill for me to swallow (in life).

Looking

I'm checking out the blog entry where ya'll gave me loads of things to do with my babes and my nephews this summer. Thanks a bunch. See you guys are an awesome resource and are appreciated!

It's almost the weekend and do you know what that means? Comfest!! For those not in this area here's a link to let you into what I'm talkin about. My Huz is taking the day off tomorrow so we can spend the day there. It's so much fun. Have a great weekend peeps!


Apparently this is my 400th post, crazy!

Wardrobe Wednesday

Pre dreadlocks and post shaved head. My bestfriend asked me if I wanted to be in her senior photos. I found these pics over at her Myspace page. I was 17 here. We're so serious, like we're gonna kick your ass. hahaha no! We weren't like that at all! We were fun and she and her parents literally kept me alive by keeping me out of the house at that time and letting me live with them. I love this chick! She's now married and momma to furry cat babes. Dawn you rock...still!

Very Disappointed

Through random handlings of nephews & babes, they managed to find and destroy the cassette tape of my wedding. I'm so upset by this, livid really. I feel like I'm going to vomit. I'm not one to keep a lot of stuff but the things I keep are very sentimental to me. They destroy everything of importance to me, I'm so disappointed.

This Whole Marriage Thang...

So I feel like my husband and I forgot what it is like to be friends. Of course he's the person I'm closest too but that doesn't necessarily say much since we don't talk that much, cause we're super busy with needy little kidlets of course. Oh and we're tired...so tired. We've been discussing this idea of friendship and how important it is in a marriage, whether it truly is important and if it is how do we work on it and grow it. It's been interesting and cool to talk about this with him. I feel like our marriage doesn't always have a measure of respect for the other person. We glide in and out of eachothers life on a daily basis, trying to acccomplish all that we need to and desire to. Nothing ever really feels finished or neat or clean or taken care of.

Sometimes, or really most days, I still function on a minimal level. Meaning that sometimes my only priority for the day is to keep the kids alive. J and I are truly spent and we know this.

One cool but not really cool because it feels not so cool but rather yucky really, is that I feel like I'm learning to not take things so personal and that even when you feel horrible and are emotionally spent, you can keep moving forward. I have learned this lesson many times before but it seems like it's a different layer of that same lesson. Like a deeper understanding learned through a more difficult time in my life.

Does any of this make any sense at all? Ahh sometimes I just want to cut the melancholy part of my brain out because I'm honestly embarrased to share what's in it at times. But this is me and I don't always make sense or write well or punctuate well but I'm trying desperately to be honest with myself and get it out so I can breathe and move on. For real does any of this make sense? If not...I'm okay with that, for now.

csa

On my other blog I just wrote a spiel on my experience thus far with buying shares in a csa. I thought I'd post it here just for those who would like a little more info about it. It's not all inclusive on the topic but more just my experience as I go through it. I hope to share continuously about it as this is one of my desires for that blog. Here's the link. Have a great weekend folks!

Random Meanderings

You ever feel like no one gives a shit what you think?

Why do kids have the ability to push you to the edge? I'm sure no sleep has something to do with that.

Will I ever have enough energy to paint my bookshelf asparagus green?

Will I finish college? When I do go back to college what will I study? Industrial Design, Computer Graphics, Landscape Architecture, finish my culinary degree...Who knows?!

Are people really capable of forgiveness?

Why are women so snippy?

Can I really frame and drywall my basement?

Will I ever be a size 9 again?

Did my nephew seriously mow my currant bush down?

I don't like questions that ask me, "What's your favorite..." I never know because it's constantly changing and I always have more than one answer.

I'm addicted to Facebook quizzes. Seriously it's dumb. It's like crack. But no shame in my game-hehehe.

Baby J Walking

Perhaps this will redeem me from my last poop post. You know you gotta have a nice balance of "yuck" and "awwws". It didn't occur to me that I was holding the camera sideways, oops! Sorry.

Life and Poop

Since the Huz has been gone, I've barely been getting sleep. This must be what it's like to be a single parent, obviously only a small part. I feel like I've been running around constantly, making breakfast, snacks, lunch, I'm in the kitchen a lot right now-way more than usual. Working my tail off more than usual and if you look at my house it's as if I've done nothing! Very frustrating. I'm gonna throw in the towel...I'm just kidding.

Called the Huz and he schmoozing it up down in Baltimore. Just kidding he's not a schmoozer in any way. But he is having fun and it seems he's been offered a teaching position which is great. What this means though is that he'll be gone a few weeks a year teaching a week long class in another city. Pretty cool and a privilege for him and as the kids get older it will be fun to accompany him along the way and tour different cities. We shall see how all of that unfolds but for now, I'm excited for him. I'm trying not to think of the week long Huz absence every other month or more...paying off debt is my focus. I'll have to keep that right up there in the forefront of my mind and recite it over and over when all three kids are screaming at me and lil peeps are peeing on the rug (or pooping...like yesterday.)

Pooping....ah yes. So I had to go to the pot yesterday. I turn the corner into the bathroom and I see little feet dangling. W was hanging out on there waiting for some action. Well I let him know,

"Momma's gotta go, You almost done?!"

W says, "It's not coming out mom, it keeps going back in!"

Me, "Well babe can you hold it for a sec while I go?"

W, "okay." I lift him off the throne and stand him next to me as we switch places. Everything is right in the world for a second.

W, "MOMMA IT'S STARTING TO COME OUT!!!"

Me, "CRAP!" W bends over to show me how it's coming out...thanks for that one babe. It wasn't quite coming out yet. I'm not sure what I was thinking but it sounded good in that moment and I kind of didn't care...I ask him,

"Okay honey do you think you can hold it in for a few seconds while you run downstairs and grab a diaper?" (all of this to a 4 year old.)

W, "Okay!" A few minutes past and so I yell down. About the same time I hear, "NOOOO!" and then "The diaper dropped my poop!" I quickly run downstairs naked butt and all, I am fully aware of my classyness, just in time to see Baby J stick his hand in a big nasty crap ball. I scream, "NO!" as if that would matter and then put the wrist of his poop hand in a death grip. With the other hand I grab the diaper from "The pooper" and swiftly grab the poop ball with the dipe. It gets disposed of and I manage to get Baby J's hand replaced with a fresh new one. Oh I forgot to mention that all of this seriously took place between 8:30-8:55am. I'm supposed to be on the other side of town to pick up my nephews at 9:00am. See again same poop schedule.

I manage to get us all in the van at 9am and seriously high tail it out east and arrive in 6 minutes-superhero powers. I bring the boys back and my oldest nephew, E sits down on the couch. I head for the kitchen, surprise surprise, and I hear E say, "YUCK!" I run in and he holds up this little rubber ball that's covered in poop. He says, "This has dookie on it!!" At that point I just started cracking up laughing.

Wardrobe Wednesday

The Gang

My Van is packed to the gills these days with these rugrats. Summer has begun, well for us atleast, we will plan our schedule soon!

What The Freak?

So I dropped the Huz off at the airport yesterday afternoon and then decided to take the kids to my parents house to see them. We were all chatting the kids were playing, etc, etc. My dad disappears out the front door to do his thang. Comes back in a few minutes later with a rag wrapped wrapped around his right hand and saturated in blood. He quickly spills out that the dog attacked him while he fed them some leftovers. Showing us his hand without the rag it begins to drip blood onto the floor. I kick it into high gear and start moving to find my keys all the while telling him, "I'm taking you to Urgent Care, let me get my stuff!" My mom who at this point starts heading for the antiseptic and gauze and other first aid equipment she keeps in the closet. She grabs some antiseptic and attempts to clean my dads wounds. I quickly tell her that it's gonna hurt like a motha if you spray that into his deep wound atop his hand. She agrees and then agrees to watch my babes as I head for my van, my dad hobbling behind me. I realize as we start moving that the Urgent Care is not open on Sunday so we instead head for the ER. He gets checked in and then is seen. Turns out he's okay but there's a fear of infection since it's a dog bite and since the dog hasn't had any shots for 2 years, my parents just adopted the dog recently and haven't yet had the opportunity to take care of the necessities. My dad who is a walking train wreck-100% disabled because of asthma, has had half his left food amputated, has mild Parkinson's, loss of vision in his right eye, and yada, yada, yada at the ripe old age of 55 is deamed Okay by the Doc's, phew!!! Needless to say I'm ready to go to bed. Fortunately the babes are in bed and actually are sleeping. Wow and their dad just left today. Holy Crap! Grateful dad's doing okay!

A Little Bit of This

I am constantly moved by this woman's perspective. She truly blows my mind. If you feel so inclined check out her blog, I won't share anything about her story you'll have to check it out for yourself.

I love this.

I'm grieved about this and this.

Been doing this for 4 weeks now. Feel more like this and less like this. Thinking I might start training for this again, slowly but surely.

And I am pretty sure I want to move here, here or here. We'll see.

The huz bought me some new shoes, what do ya think? I've been looking at them (ogling really) for about 2 years.

Digging this right now.

And I've officially been snagged by this storyline and I'm grateful for the happy ending so I can move on without worry.

Wardrobe Wednesday

I Got Sucked In

Yeah I've been MIA for a few days cause well I got sucked into the Twilight series...damnit! Right now I'm motoring through the books at lightening speed so I can just get some resolution and be done with it! Of course as soon as I got done with the first book, Twilight, I had to send the Huz to a Redbox kiosk to grab me the movie. I watched it twice and now I'm thinking I need to go spend another $1 and see it again cause well I need to...not sure entirely why, "I'm sucked in for god's sake!! There's no rhyme to my reason!" Damn teen romances!

I'm almost done. I'll see you soon. Meh.

Clothesline Challenge

I'm meeting my advanced level goal of hanging the majority of my clothes outside to dry. I've managed to hang all 14 or so loads I've done except 2. So far so good.

I must admit, it's not as fun as when I first started a few weeks ago. But I do really like that I can hang 3 to 4 loads outside and retrieve them really whenever I want, nice. Of course I left them out there a really long time, 2 days, and some of them got bird poo on them.